Pushed into a corner isn't good for your health

So while with the Hubby today, I get a call from a friend. Not that this is a unique thing, it happens. However the call I got upset me and put me into an awkward position, at the time.

This call was because this friend of mine has an issue with who my e-friends are on Facebook, one person in particular. These two have a history, to say the least. I understand wanting to cut all ties with a person, especially if it ended badly, I do. I've been there. Yet on the opposite side of the coin, I don't expect people I know to stop being cool with someone I've had dealings with and then those deals went south.

And so, this friend seemed to want me to agree to de-friend this other person. I ain't cool with that. I felt as if I was being pushed into an answer that I wasn't either wanting, ready or willing to make. And I have a rule I live by, no matter what the relationship I have with a person is. That rule is that I will not pick a side in another person's fight or disagreement. The minute someone does ask me, I pick the side that didn't ask. Why, you may ask? Because the side that didn't ask was not only being the bigger and better person, but also the true friend, provided we are friends. If not, they may have just gained one.

Well, in this instance, I couldn't do that. So I had to have an alternative and after much thinking, I figured it out. I dropped both people. I had no other, to me, reasonable choice.

Now there is drama associated with these two people. About 18 months ago, maybe even two years, there was an eruption of drama. I stayed well away from it, it ended up involving three groups of people I know who all had ties to these two. I did get pulled into it but shut that shit down faster than a Repuklicunt denying a same-sex affair before the proof gets out. And since then, all was drama free in my life. Til today.

So, yeah. Maybe not the best move in de-friending both people. However, I wasn't in the best position to make a better choice. And I don't really enjoy feeling pushed into a decision like that nor do I enjoy being asked to pick a side in another person's bulldrek. And frankly, as of right now, my faith and trust in the one doing the pseudo-asking, a.k.a. pushing for an answer, has been shaken. I'm not even sure that right now I can be around said person. And that affects/effects the friendship with at least two people.

I am very upset and hurt. If you are my friend, either in real life or in cyber space, it is not your call who I should or shouldn't be friends with. I get other people being concerned and wanting to talk. That's only fair. However, the same rules apply if you think you should try and talk me out of being cool or friends, or even e-friends, with someone due to an association or because someone you're cool with is upset. I think it's great that you have such loyalty, I do. But stay out of it. I learned a long time ago to keep out and let people work it out in whatever way is best for them. Getting involved only gets you hurt and may even cost you a valued friendship.

So now I have to see how the dust is going to settle. I got someone wanting me to call them and talk about this, who I'm sure is going to side with the friend who called me. However, I am not gonna call. I made up my mind and have set in place my decision. So as my dust settles, you all can watch and see how it plays out.

I am a 30 year old gay man who has been done with drama since I was 26. I don't need this and you most certainly don't want me to go there. If you have the problem, deal with it or don't. But do not pull me into your drama or issue because of who I choose to associate with. Let them burn me. Sure, that may open me up to an 'I told you so', but that's my choice. I'll have to live with it, not you.

Hell, there's a guy I know that several people have told me to not be cool with because of their dealings. But guess what? I'm still cool with him and he hasn't burned me. Have I been burned before? Yes. But I have this mindset to give people chances until they fuck me over, not when they fuck you over.

But, I will say that there are times when you do have to side with your friends over something. But that's in extreme cases with crazy ass people or really mean, evil cunts who are out just to fuck with as many people as they can. However, those times are so public and eruptive that it consumes everyone involved so you can't help but be part of it.

This isn't one of those times. As far as I'm concerned, it is a "he said, she said" situation because I wasn't involved nor saw what happened. And my fat faggoty ass is staying out of it. That's why I dropped both.